Trust Women is a message that is elegant in its simplicity. Trust women to make the right choices for themselves. But it’s a message that means much more.
Trust Women means to respect and trust all women to know—better than strangers, church leaders or legislators—what they can and should do with their own bodies. In the United States, we the majority believe women have a constitutional right to bodily integrity, to be sexually active with whomever they choose and to choose when or if they parent.
Yet . . .
- Support for vitally important birth control is all too often out of reach for young, sexually active females because they lack health insurance and/or finances, because they lack of adequate and age-appropriate sexual education or because they are involved in abusive domestic situation.
- One out of every 6 American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime. Rather than warnings about potential risks, as a nation we should work on changing our culture so that we truly value and respect young girls and women. And invisible to society, our incarcerated women are subjected to conditions of improper touching by persons of authority, sanctioned sexual harassment, unnecessary strip searches, sex for special privileges or money and rape. In fact, the 2010 Department of Justice report stated, “Nearly 82% of the female victims in prison said they were pressured by staff to engage in sexual activity.” Even our own military branches have allowed a culture of rape to exist with instructors raping recruits and active duty personnel.
- When a woman is unexpectedly pregnant and wants to end the pregnancy, her right to an abortion is can be denied because she is incarcerated, delayed because of funding or a complex of social reasons or ignored because of legal complications.
- When a woman knows that her grossly malformed fetus at 25 weeks has no chance at life after birth, it doesn’t mean the she will find trust and respect for her decision to abort nor readily find a doctor who is willing and capable of providing services nor readily being able to afford such an abortion.
- When a woman wants an abortion, there are legislatures, playing doctor, who want to force a transvaginal ultrasound into a woman’s vagina. There is no known law that has been put forth from any legislator that would propose inserting medical probes of any kind into a male for any reason.
- Fetal rights have trumped women’s rights in growing numbers. In fact, fetal rights advocates have convinced police, prosecutors, and judges to treat maternal addiction as a form of abuse or neglect without regard for parenting ability. Fetal rights trumped a woman’s rights in the case of Angela Carder, a young woman who was critically ill and 25 weeks pregnant. Lynn Paltrow, Executive Director, National Advocates for Pregnant Women, writes, “More than anything, she wanted to live. A court, however, ordered cesarean surgery based on claims of fetal rights. The surgery was performed over her objections as well as those of her physicians and family. Angela Carder died two days later – the cesarean surgery listed as a contributing factor. The fetus was born alive but died within two hours.” Even without a personhood measure on the books, Angela Carder died with the help of judges and doctors working quietly behind the closed doors. Her wishes were denied, her bodily integrity and her life stolen by the state.
- When a woman and her husband refuse to undergo a caesarian section, she could be a victim of coercive medicine and criminal prosecution. For example, Melissa Rowland, pregnant with twins, refused a c-section. One of the twins was stillborn so Rowland was charged with first-degree murder. After spending three months in jail, she accepted a deal in which the murder charge was dismissed in return for her guilty plea to two counts of child endangerment (unrelated to her c-section refusal). She’s now free, and serving 18 months of probation.
- Women prisoners have been subjected to degrading, gratuitous and unconstitutional cavity searches, called the labia lift, after family visits, attorney meetings and at shift changes. A violation of the fourth and eighth amendment, this practice has been stopped, thanks to the American Civil Liberties Union.
- And for women who fail to conform to the heteronormativity of our culture because they are lesbians or transgender, the danger of physical and emotional assault is ever present. For example, a 33-year old lesbian was tied up so that her homophobic male attackers could carve homophobic slurs into her abdomen and arms while law officials questioned whether the attack was faked or not.
- For low-income women who know what is best for them and for their families, access to the full spectrum of reproductive health services is often met by local family planning services. In fact, more than six in 10 women who obtained care at a family planning center considered the center their usual source of medical care. According to the Guttmacher Institute, ‘publicly funded family planning services help women to avoid pregnancies they do not want and to plan pregnancies they do. In 2006, these services helped women avoid 1.94 million unintended pregnancies, which would likely have resulted in about 860,000 unintended births and 810,000 abortions.” Despite the very real needs of low-income women, the Republicans, who are overwhelmingly prolife, want to cut funding for Title X and Planned Parenthood (essentially cutting funding to help low-income mothers and their children).
Christine Cupaiuolo, blogger for Our Bodies, Ourselves, writes, “Trust Women isn’t just a mantra of tolerance or respect. It’s a phrase that changes the playing field, in every way imaginable. It’s the right phrase to advocate for women making their own reproductive health choices, and it’s a much broader statement about our future.”
Broadly speaking, it means women are fully human and should be afforded every human right men are afforded including all rights and freedoms without distinction of any kind such as race, color, sex, language, religion, political or other opinion, national or social origin, property, birth, reproductive decision, sexual orientation or other status.

August 9, 2012 at 4:50 am
This is one of those “Seven Thousand Reasons Why We May Kill Others” columns. Substitute embryos, neonates, girls, boys, teenagers, octogenarians, Irishmen, Jews, African-Americans, Muslims, the handicapped, thieves, jaywalkers; substitute any group some of whose members you don’t want around and then remove legal protection from that group. It’s happened before (girls), it’s happening now (embryos), and it will happen in the future (?).
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August 9, 2012 at 5:39 am
I’m flabbergasted if your comment is a genuine interpretation (and not some disengenious opportunity to see your name in print).
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August 9, 2012 at 8:27 am
both
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August 9, 2012 at 10:02 am
The important thing for a so-called “pro-lifer” is to link “kill” to “abortion” in any way that he can. It’s necessary framing for the dysfunctional self-help group which calls itself “pro-life.” Repeat a meme often enough, and it will be accepted.
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August 9, 2012 at 11:00 am
The important thing for a so-called “pro-lifer” is to link “kill” to “abortion” in every way that he can.
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August 9, 2012 at 12:34 pm
Word Nerd
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August 10, 2012 at 2:59 pm
It’s a poor substitute for actually caring for a human being.
Barbara Tuchman in “The Guns of August” told of Winston Churchill campaigning in his borough for Parliament gazing upon the housing tract with his fellow campaigner and saying, “Such common people, such dreary lives!” It makes one wonder if the so-called “pro-lifers” have a real life. Mother Teresa, despite her two quotes about the subject, never worked a clinic blockade…. She had more fulfilling stuff to do.
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August 10, 2012 at 4:47 pm
My exposure to the the frequent fliers of the anti abortion types, is that they are hand-wringers and zealots.
To assuage their guilt for being lazy sots, they throw out promises of help. However, those promises are never fullly articulated. The cry “We can help you” more often than not means “We Can Help You ONLY If You Don’t Abort” or “Here, take this literature” which provides a phone number that doesn’t work on weekends.
They will not baby sit their objectified ‘saves’ which is also known as a fetus/woman combination. They will not provide quality furnishings for a young, displaced woman. Instead, they dive in dumpsters and troll second hand stores because what they give “is good enough” for their SAVES.
They will not provide space in their own homes for those “SAVES” because they are not to their own liking (racist, bigot, ad nauseum).
They will not want to touch these folks. Hence, the protester who walks around with hand sanitizer on her hip (lest she get racist cooties) reveals a bit of truth about themselves.
Finally, I wouldn’t give so much credit to Mom. T. While she was honest about her faith and her doubts, she also profitted enormously by her celebrity status. I do want to believe she cared for those children but I also know that celebrity status has a way of destroying even the most faithful.
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August 10, 2012 at 5:13 pm
I prove the lie to that, Kate. Celebrity status hasn’t hurt me.
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August 10, 2012 at 7:16 pm
Johny Boy, there is NO way you would ever parellel the work of Teresa. You do no work of value, have no media value and, sadly, no one, but the FBI gives a tinker’s damn (hence, the moniker, Loser Cruiser).
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August 11, 2012 at 3:41 am
ooof
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August 9, 2012 at 12:49 pm
Trust God.
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August 9, 2012 at 1:19 pm
Yes, let’s trust that God gave women intellectual, emotional, spiritual and physical qualities. She also trusts women to use those qualities as they freely choose.
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August 10, 2012 at 6:57 am
Here’s a great article that provides a closer look at the birth control battles, all fought with a whooping dose of shame
http://www.womenshealthmag.com/health/birth-control-rights?page=3#ixzz236ZkGFos
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August 13, 2012 at 5:59 am
interesting article, although it is lengthy.
thus far, it affirms my own belief that the problem that those who support choice and hormonal birth control actually face is access, more than the right to these services.
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August 10, 2012 at 7:55 am
“In other words, that little pill could, in the world of Personhood, be deemed a lethal weapon, an instrument of homicide.”
Leave it to the killers’ helpers in a cheap (in every way) bonkadonk mag to zero in on the real horror — “birth control.” Real birth control requires self control. The stuff these folks peddle promotes indulgence and murder.
Prolifers must realize that the holocaust we are enduring began with the legal killing of the youngest people, the less than week-olds. We really didn’t get involved till they began legally killing the two and three month olds.
Here’s the present situation: we will either start killing the one and two year olds, or we will start protecting the one and two day olds.
(EC, it is permissible, is it not, to transfer posts here to my newsletter? I need something just about this size to finish “September.”)
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August 10, 2012 at 8:53 am
Reductio ad absurdum
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August 10, 2012 at 9:04 am
I remember a minister using that term to answer a Lambeth critic who said, “Legalize embryocide and we’ll soon be legalizing feticide.”
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August 10, 2012 at 1:34 pm
For those anti choicers out there who whine and lick their emotional wounds, who carry around so much negativity, for those who see themselves as the perpetual victim . . .
Here are 10 ways to defend yourself against negativity:
1. Don’t take other people’s negativity personally.
2. Spend more time with positive people.
3. Be the positivity you want to see in the world.
4. Change the way you think.
5. Focus on solutions.
6. Love whoever is around to be loved.
7. Provide support when it makes sense.
8. Realize that life is a series of ups and downs.
9. Concentrate on today.
10. Let go and move on when you must.
I especially like the last one—Seriously, let go. Move on. Seriously. If you don’t like your vocation as a protester or terrorist, move on to something that won’t deflate your sense of self.
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August 11, 2012 at 3:46 am
Positivity, positivity, yeah, let’s have some positivity around here. Seriously, Kate, you’re so much better than these Ann Landers types you occasionally attempt to resurrect
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August 13, 2012 at 6:02 am
wonderful article kate!
thank you SO much!
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August 11, 2012 at 10:34 pm
I like that saying “trust women” — it goes right to the heart of the matter. Individual women should decide the future of their bodies. My body/My choice.
I’m new to this forum but I am happy to hear Our Bodies, Ourselves supports your message. I have used their books as a bible for my developing femininity for many, many years!
What if my brother, who sexually abused me as a pre-pubescent girl, caused me to be pregnant? He didn’t but hypothetically, I would like to think everyone would agree that for me to carry and birth my brother’s child would cause unmentionable harm to me — the woman who should have a choice and be trusted to make the right choice given her personal circumstances. I’d like to believe and hope if I was 12 years old my family, doctors and others would recommend that I have an abortion rather than sustain further abuse by carrying and giving birth to a sexual predators child. God help me, if I had to sustain further abuse. Behind each pregnancy is a woman who knows what is best and women should be trusted to make the right choice for themselves.
I honestly don’t understand how individual choice effects anyone else. It’s personal.
–Daylily
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August 12, 2012 at 4:34 am
It’s personal as well, lil, for the person another or others want dead. Shouldn’t she have a choice? I mean, who has the most riding on the outcome?
Your incest experience is more common than we realize, maybe with cousins and close family friends more than with brothers. Another reason parents are responsible for running a tight ship.
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August 12, 2012 at 8:20 am
Parents are responsible, but so-called “pro-lifers” won’t let women decide whether they are ready to be that sort of parent. Which makes so-called ‘pro-lifers’ complicit in the creation of sex offenders.
The fetal Ted Bundy lived, and up to sixty-one women died. Which is the lesser evil, that one die and sixty-one live, or that one live and sixty-one die?
The alternative to that Bundy ethical dilemma is that the person who insists a fetus be carried to term be the one to raise the consequent baby, but the so-called “rescuers” say “nooooooo……..”
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August 12, 2012 at 8:33 am
Deja-vu all over again except for the first paragraph. I never heard that before and I don’t know what Chuck’s talking about there.
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August 12, 2012 at 12:03 pm
If you wanted to know what I was talking about, Mr. Dunkle, you would be false to your convictions.
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August 12, 2012 at 10:46 am
Your reply is ambiguous and I’m not certain where you stand. I read all of your comments and I think you lean toward not believing I should have the choice about what I do with my body. How is it that you think you get to make decisions about what happens in my life. If you don’t want an abortion than don’t have one.
To answer your question about who has more riding on my decision, the answer would be me. You are not a part of my life or my future so you have nothing riding on it. Please worry about things that effect your life. I trust you will make the right decisions for yourself and if you don’t, that is your problem and I am not presumptuous enough to tell you what you should do. I don’t even know you and you don’t know me. How is it that you could make a decision about someone you don’t know?
I sought the help of a reproductive endocrinologist to achieve pregnancy. I chose to do IVF which involves embryo transfers, successfully conceiving my first child that way. I also tried frozen embryo transfers which did not work, unfortunately. I thank God that assisted reproductive technologies are available for men and women as a choice. I suspect you have an issue with fertility clinics, too. But, abortions and fertility procedures are available choices and they are legal.
Are you trying to turn back the clock? Take away women’s rights? Do you wish I didn’t have the right to vote, too?
My second post on this issue and I think you get where I stand.
–Daylily
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August 12, 2012 at 12:09 pm
Daylily2011: You said: “Your reply is ambiguous and I’m not certain where you stand. I read all of your comments and I think you lean toward not believing I should have the choice about what I do with my body.”
Rest assured, he stands in favor of him having control over your body.
You said: “Please worry about things that effect your life.”
What affects his life most is his need to be a hero in as psychologically economical a way as possible. This means inventing a perfect victim– the fetus fits the bill eminently well– and inventing his perfect opponent (one that cannot hurt him!), which is the role abortion plays. If he wins at this game, he feels better, and in any event he doesn’t lose– unless he stops pretending to be a hero.
He’s part of a dysfunctional self-help group which calls itself “pro-life,” but will not undertake to nurture to adulthood every “unborn human” they want to “rescue.”
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August 12, 2012 at 3:21 pm
Thanks for the clarification. I do agree that the pro-life fight does appear and feel like a dysfunctional mentality. I can’t honestly understand why people are so worked up about what any person does with their own body, as long as it is not illegal it’s my right to do as I wish.
I think you are correct that there is a hero mentality that boosts the ego of people like John (hey, he referrred to me as ‘lil’). John could be a real hero by fostering unwanted children or adopting special needs kids, that would be noble. Instead he is focused on advocating for a cause that doesn’t need his help. Women can be trusted to make the right decisions about their bodies — we don’t need heroes stepping in acting like they know what is best.
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August 12, 2012 at 4:01 pm
Hey, Chuckles and lil! I think we got two frienzies going here. Too bad they cancelled Chuck’s blog, abortionscentrimla. Sounds as if lil might have been the only one able to understand it.
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August 12, 2012 at 7:04 pm
Again, I must say you are ambiguous and I don’t get your point. What exactly are you saying? Do you know how to write so those of us on the outside of this issue understand you and your position? Perhaps it is that I’m new here and maybe others understand what you mean between the lines of what you write. But, as a newcomer I don’t understand your message. Can you get rid of the sarcasm and anger and be straight forward?
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August 12, 2012 at 8:01 pm
Sure, I’m ironic, not sarcastic, and I don’t have any anger. OK for starters?
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August 13, 2012 at 9:42 am
“Irony is using language, an expression that has its usual meaning, in a way that means just the opposite, typically for humorous or emphatic effect.
“Sarcasm can be wildly witty, cutting, and funny to all involved except the target, it may be used in a more interpersonal way to mock, hurt, demean, and humiliate.
“There can be a fine line between irony and sarcasm, especially if the target does not accept or perceive (near-)equality or intimacy with his/her interlocutor, in which case what was meant ironically may come over as sarcastic or impudent.” (usingenglish.com)
Since I do not feel intimate with you (calling me “lil” it’s not working) your replies are not ironic, sarcastic or impudent are more apt descriptions.
I suggest you read a dictionary because I have discovered a few more words for you to look up “arch, audacious, bold, bold-faced, brash, brassbound, brassy, brazen, brazen-faced, cheeky, cocksure, cocky, fresh, impertinent, nervy, insolent, sassy, saucy, wise” (merriam-webster.com).
I see your name all over the place, promoting your agenda so I would have to say you have already “started” and with this reply I will be finished with having further discussions with you. Find a new target for your misplaced anger.
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August 13, 2012 at 11:02 am
Well, so-long, neophyte (guess what that means before you look it up).
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August 13, 2012 at 9:34 am
DayLily, you and Mr. Dunkle are communicating on two different levels– you are treating him as someone from whom you would expect clear, straightforward and factual answers. As a self-proclaimed “pro-lifer,” he cannot but reply to you with jargon, half-truths, obfuscation and misdirection.
Unfortunately, the aborticentrism site is now off-line; it would have helped you to understand him.
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August 13, 2012 at 9:48 am
Yes, I see what you mean. He does not want to address my questions so I’m done trying.
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August 13, 2012 at 11:04 am
I blame you, Chuck. You cater to these folks’ dis-functions and then they run.
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